My Valentine’s Day Don’ts

Valentine’s Day is almost here .The time to see who’s going out with who, who has been eyeing who and who is getting dumped. But there are certain things you should avoid doing this year. Make this year’s Valentine’s Day different. To do that,  avoid doing things listed below:

1. Please DON’T WEAR RED
There is a common saying that “love is blind”. Question is why is RED of all colours in the whole spectrum of light the colour of love? If love is blind, why do we force it to be symbolized by the colour red? Red is a BEAUTIFUL colour but it is just not for everyone. If you know your skin tone will be battling with the colour of your clothes, then I suggest you try something lighter. Like white. Some of you over do this red colour on Valentine’s Day- red skirt, red shirt and red socks (burn them! You should NEVER own a pair of them). If you want to this year’s Valentine’s Day to be memorable, try make your outfit memorable.

2. DON’T ASK SOMEBODY OUT AT 11:59 pm on the 13th
Do you know how desperate that is? Asking somebody to be your date at the 11th hour? It is so RUDE! It reflects badly on you. It makes you seem like 1) you have ZERO game 2) you are a poor planner (nobody wants to go out with such a person) 3) you are rude as hell. I don’t care if your eyes opened to love only at 11.56pm.I beg of you not stoop that low for a conversation at the dinner table and a kiss (if you are lucky enough…also not at ALA).

3. If you didn’t get them flowers, chocolates, cards or any “Valentine’s like gift” before, don’t bother doing it now. If you want to keep the bae, dare to be different. The art of buying gifts is one that can only be mastered with delicate practice and time. Once you get it right the first time, you will secure yourself a bae. Everybody can get anybody a typical Valentine’s gift, get your special someone something different. Get a t-shirt written ‘Forever Mine’ or a bracelet with both your names on it and a cute message engraved on it. Make the gift seem like you put enough thought before you bought it. Everybody likes that. Don’t make the gift seem like an afterthought.

4. Worst Mistake: TRYING TO GET OUT OF THE FRIENDZONE ON VALENTINES DAY!
You had a thousand chances to save your face from being zoned. Why choose Valentines Day to escape? Are you Romeo or Juliet? Ideally, this would the perfect time to proclaim your affection for somebody but honey, lets get real, IT AINT GONNA HAPPEN!It’s also extremely cliché. Try another time, maybe Heroes Day, Farmers Day or Freedom Day but not Valentines Day. Why would you want to do that to yourself? It makes you look thirsty. Unfortunately, nobody likes thirsty people. You will seem less romantic and more like an opportunist! Don’t do it. Oh my Gahd.

I hope this list will be helpful to the optimistic romantic people out there!

Going the Distance

With just about 5 weeks left until graduation, we’re all beginning to think about what it will be like not seeing the faces we have gotten so used to anymore. It’s so potentially depressing. We’ve gotten to know and actually like people, and now life and its annoying full-of-change-ness wants to place us miles apart from each other. It sucks but it needs to be accepted. Yes, the 2nd years will graduate (not a bad thing. Do you want them to not graduate?) And the first years will still have one year at ALA. It can’t be stopped unless you have invented some time pausing remote. The more feasible thing to do is plan how you’re going to keep your relationships alive over longer distances. It’s not easy but nothing worth anything is, so here are some tips to help with keeping in touch.

1. Send updates. You don’t have to wait till something huge happens in your life to tell your friends about it. Don’t make them have to find out from your profile picture that you dyed your hair green. Quick little texts or emails are nice. Your friend will feel included in your life and will be more likely to keep you in the loop of their lives as well

2. Know what your friend’s days look like. If you and your friend know when you’re both free and awake (time differences, people. Acknowledge them!) then keeping in touch will be much easier. Knowing just how busy your friend is also helps you judge whether or not calling them at a certain time could lead to you talking to a very agitated, grumpy person or not. Agreeing to sit down and catch up at least once every month, week or even day (if you must) could also be helpful so when you miss your friend, you always have that time to look forward to.

3. Do not get mad. Don’t get emotional. If your friend doesn’t call you when they said they would, or cuts a conversation short, or replies you every 2 days, try not to take it personally. As amazing as you are,and as much as they love you, none of your friends are just sitting on shelves waiting for you to call. They have things they are doing. Avoid attacking them and telling them they’ve forgotten you. It will just upset them and make things weird. Instead, just be there for them when they can and do want to talk. Don’t spend the conversations you do have being angry at them for not being available 24/7.

4. Something that will really help with number 3 is this: live your own life. Wherever your friend is, you are somewhere too and don’t let that place pass you by. Enjoy being around the people who are nearby and doing things where you are. Be happy and don’t become dependent on a message to make your day good. Friendships that are meant to last will last. No matter what you do, the outcome is the same (#obscure literature class reference.)

Love Or Understanding

Most people are looking for that one person whom they can love and who can love them – that one person who will be there for them, care for them and understand them. Being understood is often confused with being loved; the two aren’t the same.

Most people assume that those whom they love, they understand and that those who love them, understand them as well. The problem is that this is not always the case. Understanding and knowing someone is very tricky. People aren’t static beings – their personalities change over time.

Knowing someone takes a lot of work, just as does love. However, the more compatible individuals are, the more they will get to know and understand each other and the deeper they will fall for each other. The issue is that sometimes the more you get to know someone, the less you love what you see.

You can love someone whom you believe you know, whom you believe you understand, even when in reality you know nothing about that person. Because we are so keen on falling in love, we allow ourselves to be blind to the truth – it feels better that way. This is not to say that loving someone you don’t know and don’t understand is common, but if loving someone you don’t understand even the least bit is possible then loving someone you don’t understand completely is certainly possible.

I’d even argue that when we first fall for someone, we do so without really understanding him or her as an individual. We allow ourselves to fill in the gaps with our imaginations, creating a person in our minds who doesn’t actually exist.

It takes time to get to know someone and then understand that person. Hell, sometimes we know someone and still aren’t able to understand him or her. Understanding isn’t knowledge alone. Understanding is knowing and being able to relate – it’s being able to comprehend the logic that is behind the actions of the individual.

It’s understanding the thought process the person goes through. It’s basically knowing the way he or she thinks and why he or she thinks that way. You can understand someone without loving him or her, but when you understand and love a person it’s because you can relate to that person in some way.

This is the connection that we feel with the people that we have loved for an extended period of time. Time is necessary for understanding and loving an individual. The reason many relationships fail is that, with time, we either feel that we aren’t able to understand the person we love or that we aren’t able to love what we understand about that person.

Sooner or later, you will come to recognize the shallowness of your relationship for what it is and you’ll be forced to make a difficult decision: either continue lying to yourself or accept the facts and move on.

 

The Friend Zone

Urban dictionary likes to define the Friend-zone as “the worst position someone can be in, if they have feelings for someone. When a person develops romantic feelings for someone, but the other person only sees the relationship as just being friends.” Most people would define it as the place where egos die. But what is the logic behind the Friend Zone? Continue reading “The Friend Zone”

Why Do You Have To Be All Cheesy?

Through every spring,
There should be a blossoming flower.
Through every winter,
There should be a cold front.
Through every relationship,
There should be common ground.
This is not meant to be a poem or prose but a series of thought provoking sentences. (Don’t think they will work if you are trying to score points)
• I can share my emotions with the world but I can only express my feelings to the one I care for.
• My eyes may be filled with water at all times but only you can get to see my tears.
• At times I wonder why I find love absurd but only get to love you meaningfully.
• There is no guarantee that I will get to see the sun rise but there is hope that I will be with you the next day.
• Every breath I take comes from a series of airways but every moment I spend with you creates a sequence of memories.
Enough with the cheesy phrases (They will never make literal sense either way). We always find phrases which we tend to associate with our daily life activities, either painful or joyful. Have you ever wondered why some people always mess up their first crush approach? A very simple letter or conversation can express your emotions clear and simple, but well some people seem to find reason in ‘poetic’ manner. Why don’t you just say what you want to say like it is? Maybe it works for some people but honestly what if the person does not even have a clue of the ambiguous word you used means? It’s rather interesting to know what pick-up lines people use when given the chance to.
Share the one which was once used on you…
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Teenage Relationships

So far we have all been lectured by our parents about the boys that are going to ruin our future or the girls that are going to attempt to trap us- we’ve heard it but we choose to ignore it. We want to experience and we want to live it. We want to rebel because we feel like we’re being held back and really in these teenage years it is hard to control our emotions, and so we don’t listen to our parents. Continue reading “Teenage Relationships”